A Quick Thought

This is just a quick note to myself that I think will facilitate some healing on my part. I was watching a National Geographic movie called "In the Womb" a couple of days ago. It was very well done and fascinating. My problem was that all that I could think of during the first little bit was the miscarriage I had. It will be 3 years in April. My baby was developed to 5 weeks but I didn't find out until 8 weeks. He would have had a beating heart and the beginnings of electrical brain impulses. Yes I say he because I belive this baby was a boy. I believe that he was just not ready to come to our family at that time for some reason or another. I will not even begin to question God's purposes. I only have faith that He has my best interests at heart. Please don't get me wrong either, I felt my Savior by my side during this whole experience. That was the most spiritual Easter I have ever had in my life. I truly learned what the Atonement means to me and my family. At first I thought how silly that I would still be sad about this after this much time has passed but I now realize it won't matter how much time has passed I will mourn this loss for the rest of my life. It may not always be as painful as it is now but I will always have a spot in my heart for this experience that taught me so much. I know that at some point I will be able to raise that baby whether in this life or during another time in my existence. I know that he will be a part of my eternal family and for that knowledge I am more grateful than words will ever be able to express. My love and prayers go out to any family that has had to deal with this kind of loss and I hope that if you haven't found love and peace through our Savior Jesus Christ that you will seek it. I promise you it will come!